After over ten months of trying hard to reassure myself that one year in Liberia would be plenty, I've accepted an extension to my internship with LEAD. Upon landing in GR on August 31, I'll be spending two months reconnecting with friends and family, hangin' with the nephew I've never met, camping, sailing, working odd jobs, renting out my house, and planning / fundraising for a return to West Africa at the beginning of November where I will stick around until May, 2011.
Allen originally extended the invitation to stay on many months ago, but I'd always deflect any kind of commitment. I thought one year would be enough, and that after that I'd feel inspired to move on, do something else, and be able to tick off the 'spend significant time overseas' check box. But when going through my last quarterly evaluation, I began to really think hard about what roles LEAD and Liberia have now played in my life. I've carefully thought it through and I feel strongly led and excited to make a comeback tour.
Hmm, okay that may be overstating it a little bit but allow me to add this context: I do feel inspired to come back, however right now I'm exhausted; fed up with some cultural attributes, and I'm even a bit apathetic. I struggle to work up the motivation to make the extra effort to connect with those around me, and some daily tasks even seem a bit daunting. Simply put, I think its a sign of this being the longest I've ever been separated from the family, friends, activities and surroundings that I love and am used to.
Despite these frustrations, my expat friends in town are highly encouraging of me to stick around (I'm fun) and have all reassured me that two months back home will leave me hopping and skipping, ready to get back into the thick of it. I've also told many people that if I make the active choice of committing to more time knowing full well what I'm getting myself into, I've only me to blame for any frustrations I may have...
When it came time to make a decision, I did it the same way I did when I bought my house, when I chose a college before that, and when I tried to figure out who to ask to senior banquet before that: with a pro/con list. In an effort to explain my decision and stem the tide of angry friends and family, I'll share my LIBERIA vs. NOT LIBERIA list with you.
First, NOT LIBERIA:
-If I were to return to Liberia I would have to be away from family and friends for six more months.
-I would have to deal with six more months of culture stress.
-I would have to do more fundraising.
Now... LIBERIA:
-LEAD is at an exciting point. Its maturing quickly and I'd love to witness it as it continues to do so, especially if it means getting to work with Allen and the rest of the staff longer.
-I've noticed that I've developed a sense of 'ownership' with Liberia. I get a little hurt inside when people do things that harm the country, and I want to do my part to help its development.
-I'm really interested in the business mentoring program I've been working on, and I'd like to develop it further so that its model can be implemented elsewhere.
-There may be opportunity to work with some of the other Partners Worldwide affiliates in West Africa and I'd love learn more about what they are doing.
-I will get to work on some other fun projects, like planning a conference on the topic of marketing (a business skill lacking in Liberia second only to customer service, the topic of this past conference), and also seeing if LEAD could be a good Kiva field partner.
-My motorcycle accident set me back in terns of surfing, and I want six more months to get good. (I didn't say they were selfless reasons)
-I'll be back in time for the 2011 summer sailing season on Gauntlet! (although I may miss out on spring cleaning...sorry Guy and guys)
-I love my Liberia friends! (although its a bummer when they leave all the time)
-Expat newbs TOTALLY look up to you if you've been around for over a year, especially if you actually decided to stay on longer than originally intended.
-I'm not ready for grad school yet and more overseas experience will better prepare me for it.
-When it comes down to it, its only another six months, which will pass by quickly.
-With few other options available to me outside of Liberia which are directly related to my chosen vocation, all of these PROs clearly outweigh the CONs.
There you have it. Upon leaving Liberia 'for good' at the beginning of May 2011, I will have spent two American Thanksgivings, two Halloweens, two Christmases, two New Years', two Easters and I will have turned 24 and 25 in Liberia. I'll be around for the beginnings of the 2011 presidential elections which should be exciting and I'll make it just in time for the beginnings of next year's surf season.
I'm lookin' forward to meeting up with as many of you as possible in September and October!
Until then, keep your stick on the ice, Derek
